Full Circle

Life has a funny way of cycling so that old becomes new again and vice versa. It amazes me how we can come so far and still wind up in a familiar place.

Four years ago, I went to North Carolina on very short notice to help my sister pack up her stuff and move back to Chicagoland. I’ve talked about this trip before. I’m not going to go into detail as to why I had to do that because it’s not my place. However, I will say that both her life and mine were nowhere near the place we wanted them to be. For me, everything truly felt hopeless for the first time. The woman I loved made a choice that left me on the outside looking in. My career was in flux. My friends weren’t around.

The night before I left for the North Carolina trip, Buttons (my cat) was very sick. For some reason, she decided to vomit under my bed. In order to fully clean that, I had to take every piece of my bed apart (probably a metaphor for my life falling apart). Needless to say, I was not pleased about having to do so. As was the norm back then, I distracted myself by logging on to Stickam. I went into my friend Erika’s live. Upon entering, there was a guy I didn’t know very well who made some sort of crack about my user name. Normally I would’ve laughed such a thing off, but I was particularly cranky. So I abused my power as moderator and promptly kicked him out of the chat. I had no idea that Erika was interested in him, and it was the closest she ever got to being angry with me. This probably sounds like a strange aside, but remember this story. It’ll be important later.

That trip to North Carolina changed my life. It didn’t all happen right away, but it was a realization that I needed to both grow up and stop pitying myself. I became a more mature teacher as a result. That trip laid the groundwork for me to become the man I am today. However, because of the sadness attached to that trip, I said I would never go back to North Carolina… except, I did.

Two weeks ago I went with my parents, my sister, and my brother-in-law to North Carolina, for a very different reason. Instead of helping my sister pick up the pieces of her life, we were merely helping her put the finishing touches on putting it all together. They found a nice place, and they’re ready to finally start the next chapter of their lives together, a chapter that was delayed as he was in Afghanistan almost immediately following their wedding. It was a bittersweet experience, as I never like it when people close to me move far away, as I fear they will move on without me. Yet I am happy for them and excited for the next step of their journey.

I spent the majority of the trip in North Carolina, but I took a little detour down to South Carolina to see two people who have become very important to me over the past four years. As it turns out, after I kicked that guy (Matt) out of Erika’s live, it kickstarted conversation between the two of them. They realized they liked each other quite a bit, and eventually Erika moved down to Myrtle Beach to live with Matt. Over the course of time, my friendship with both of them grew, and I had the privilege of spending a day with the two of them. It was crazy to think of where the past four years had taken us, and the timing of meeting them was not lost on me. We had an awesome relaxed day, and I can’t wait to see them again. It’s amazing how live was able to bring us together.

That love interest that I talked about earlier? About a week after my North Carolina trip, she had some very interesting news. Yesterday (though the doors on the possibility of the two of us ever being together have completely closed) she texted me to give me that same news. My life has gone full circle.

The first North Carolina trip resulted in my life falling back together. I’ll be honest with you. I could use that right now. My trip was supposed to have a third leg in Pittsburgh, and to make a long story short, that didn’t happen and it crushed me. I’m not happy that my sister is gone, and there’s more uncertainty about my career than I would prefer. If there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that life comes full circle. Things have fallen back into place before. I’m hopeful that they do again.