I truly believe that the greatest gift that you can give to another person is to genuinely let them know that who they are and what they do matters. It has been my goal in 2014 to become a more thoughtful person. A string of deaths to some individuals who positively affected my life led me to conceive this series. As the words to my favorite song go, “And for those who have stood by my side, you are the story I tell.” You are the words and pages to my story.
Over the course of the next several months, I will be writing open letters to those who have positively impacted my story. I’m not going to lie. It is my goal to make you cry, not out of grief or pain but out of the realization that you do truly matter. I am not doing this in order of how important you are to me. For the most part (other than birthdays or other important events), the letters will be done in a random order. I hope you enjoy, and I hope you come away from this with the realization that you are extremely important to me.
Dear Shannon,
It amuses me that we met years ago on a dating site, even though neither of us had any intention of using that particular site to date anyone. Sometimes we find great things in the most unlikely of places. This was one of those times.
If someone asked me to draw my definition of “South Side Irish”, I’d refuse, mostly because my artistic skills are remedial at best. What I would do, however, is show them a picture of you.
“South Side Irish” to me is demonstrated by a blue-collar sense of toughness. You are one of the toughest people I know, and I mean that as a complete compliment. You have never shied away from giving your completely honest opinion on anything, and I appreciate that. In fact, you’re one of only a couple people in the world who could say virtually anything to me without offending me. I know you’re saying what you’re saying because you care. If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t even bother getting tough with me. Even through all the toughness, there is still a sweetness to your nature that I feel blessed to get to see.
Your toughness isn’t merely shown by your tough love methods of dealing with people. Rather, there is an inner strength that shines through and permeates everything you do. You don’t sit around feeling sorry for yourself. You realize that there is no point in moping. The greatest successes in life come from pulling yourself up by your bootstraps and doing.
I never had the chance to meet your father before he passed, but I’m sure he had to be one heck of a tough guy for a couple reasons. One, you’d have to be tough to make it in a house with you! Also, I believe that he had to have instilled some of that toughness in you. While we all like to believe that some things are innately in us, we do get a lot of things from the people who raised us. One thing I am sure of is that he would be so proud of you today. I know I am.
Our paths have crossed in person only once, but that doesn’t diminish our friendship. I love our NCIS and NCIS: Los Angeles chats, even though I have to wait a couple days to have them because you never watch live! I love that you can tear me a new one in a conversation but do it in a way that somehow makes me feel better by the end of the conversation. You’ve helped me look at things in ways I might not have thought to look by myself. Even though there has been a lot in my life that has changed the past 4 and a half years, you have been a constant. I am so excited for what is to come for you in your very near future, and I am excited for the opportunity for our friendship to continue to grow. Maybe you could lend me some of that strength you have!
Love always,
Jakob
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