I truly believe that the greatest gift that you can give to another person is to genuinely let them know that who they are and what they do matters. It has been my goal in 2014 to become a more thoughtful person. A string of deaths to some individuals who positively affected my life led me to conceive this series. As the words to my favorite song go, “And for those who have stood by my side, you are the story I tell.” You are the words and pages to my story.
Over the course of the next several months, I will be writing open letters to those who have positively impacted my story. I’m not going to lie. It is my goal to make you cry, not out of grief or pain but out of the realization that you do truly matter. I am not doing this in order of how important you are to me. For the most part (other than birthdays or other important events), the letters will be done in a random order. I hope you enjoy, and I hope you come away from this with the realization that you are extremely important to me.
Dear Montes,
Of all the letters in this series I’ve done, this is one I’ve tended to put off because I knew it would be a humbling experience for me. I don’t know that I’m necessarily high on your list of student teachers that you’d like to hear from. But I never got a chance to thank Matt Gavin for all the help he was for me during that time period, and I’m not about to let any more time go by without expressing to you what you’ve meant to me as an educator.
McSweeney couldn’t have put me with a better teacher to learn from. I’ve learned from some phenomenal teachers, but none of them did things quite like you. You had a knack for experiential learning and presenting social studies in a way that students could relate and make connections. I know you shrugged it off and attributed all of that to the “History Alive” curriculum, but if that were the truth, then all teachers would be able to pull it of as well as you do. You and I both know that’s not the case. The lessons you taught were incredible. I’ve been able to use the Kush token trading lesson as an example of my favorite lesson in every teaching interview I’ve had.
I can’t thank you enough for how generous you were with your resources. You had a formula that worked, and instead of simply keeping it to yourself, you were more than willing to share it with me. I still have all your lessons saved on my hard drive, and I have been able to use a number of things in my own classroom. You gave me a background in experiential learning that I would not have had otherwise.
Despite all that, I don’t know that we ever really clicked. I’m sure you probably saw me as some clueless kid who didn’t want to listen and only cared about the approval of the kids. That honestly wasn’t the case, at least not fully. I was just trying to find my sea legs. I was finding myself not only as an educator but also as a person, and I just didn’t know any better. I was trying to find a way that worked for me.
As someone who had never been the most confident person in the world to that point, the adulation of the students became addicting. I thought that in order to succeed as a teacher, I needed to get the kids on my side, so to speak. As a result, I was more lax as a 21 year old student teacher than I am as a 27 year old teacher. I had a hard time feeling like I had to live up to Matt Gavin. After all, he was your prize protégé turned star HLR teacher. I realized I was never going to be able to live up to him, so I foolishly tried to carve my own niche. I should have realized that both of you guys knew better because you were doing it longer, and I should have been more receptive to the advice that you gave me.
After student teaching, I thought about the philosophical differences we had. I chalked it up to our differences in age. As I got older and more experienced, I realized that it really was a matter of you knowing better and me needing to realize that I didn’t have all the answers. Some of your lessons took a few years to percolate and finally sink in, but they got there.
I’ve spent the last two years teaching in an alternative middle school. I’m sure you’re even more surprised that they didn’t eat me alive. I’ve gotten older and (hopefully) a little wiser over time. As such, I need to man up and admit you were right. I may never do things quite like you do, but I need to tell you that more often than not, you were right. I feel so privileged to have learned under you, and I hope someday I can positively influence young teachers in the same way that you influenced me. Maybe one day we can grab a bite and I can tell you about the journey my career has taken since Richards.
All the best,
Jakob
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