I truly believe that the greatest gift that you can give to another person is to genuinely let them know that who they are and what they do matters. It has been my goal in 2014 to become a more thoughtful person. A string of deaths to some individuals who positively affected my life led me to conceive this series. As the words to my favorite song go, “And for those who have stood by my side, you are the story I tell.” You are the words and pages to my story.
Over the course of the next several months, I will be writing open letters to those who have positively impacted my story. I’m not going to lie. It is my goal to make you cry, not out of grief or pain but out of the realization that you do truly matter. I am not doing this in order of how important you are to me. For the most part (other than birthdays or other important events), the letters will be done in a random order. I hope you enjoy, and I hope you come away from this with the realization that you are extremely important to me.
Dear Ahmah, Papa, Grandma, Grandpa, and Aunt Helen,
Let me just first of all say, thanks for the good genetics. With the approximately 400 combined years that you have lived, I’m a lock for 100! In all seriousness though, I have plenty for which to thank all of you other than that.
I know over the years you may not have gotten to know me as well as other family members. By nature, I am not as outgoing or gregarious as Heidi, as quirky as Andy, or as… Beth… as Beth (not sure how I could put that any better). Even though I’ve always been a bit more reserved, I hope that it’s never come across as me being disinterested or anything of the like. I am just as appreciative for everything that you’ve done for me. I’ve learned a lot from each of you over the years.
Ahmah, I have benefited from your guidance both personally and professionally. The insights you gave me into being a substitute teacher were so valuable. I probably would not have survived those three years in Orland without them. The fact that you still teach and at nearly 80 years old can control a classroom better than educators half your age is both astonishing and inspiring. I have always appreciated your ability to make everyone feel appreciated and loved, each in their own individual way.
Papa, your work ethic is legendary. You put people my age to shame with how hard you’ve worked and how you continue to still do things. You’ve shown that pain is never an excuse, and ultimately you’ve shown that excuses should never get in the way of doing what needs to be done. I know over the years that you’ve joked that your granddaughters were tougher than your grandsons. I hope that two marathons later, I’ve caused you to reexamine those views at least.
Grandma, thank you for being the best cook I know, although it might be because your cooking is so good that I won’t settle for certain things being made by anyone else! Thank you for everything you’ve done for Heidi and me over the years. Our summers growing up would not have been the same if you hadn’t been around. I still look back fondly on the mall trips, the rounds of miniature golf, the games of bowling, and the lunches afterward. Your generosity has never gone unnoticed.
Grandpa, I wouldn’t be able to type up this letter were it not for you teaching me how to type many years ago. I’ve always appreciated the interest you’ve taken in whatever it is that I’ve been doing with my life, whether school or work. I’ve always noticed the way your eyes light up when Heidi or I tell you what’s going on in our lives. It means a lot to know that you’re proud of us and support us in all of our endeavors. Thank you for that.
Aunt Helen, though technically not a grandparent, I have always thought of you as a fifth grandparent. As I get older (and yes, I understand that by this point I am still by no means “old”), a little doubt starts to creep in as to whether I will ever wind up marrying anyone. You have shown me that in the event that I never do get married, I can still lead a full and rewarding life. You still have the ability to do things that people a quarter of your age cannot do. Your creativity is something that I hope to be able to mirror and channel in my own life. Put simply, you are one of a kind.
You have all been so generous with your time and resources, and it has always been appreciated. Sometimes I think you treat me too well. I cannot underscore how blessed I am to be 27 years old and still have all my living grandparents (plus an Aunt Helen). There are two things that I’ll be able to collectively take from you for the rest of my life. First, you are a testament to making things work and finding a love that lasts. Your two marriages have a combined longevity of close to 120 years. That’s incredible. Also, I’d like to think I couldn’t do any better in the parental department than the parents I have. They had to have learned from somewhere. Thank you for setting such a great example in parenting and in life and creating a legacy that my parents carry on and one which I hope to continue one day.
Love always,
Jakob
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